Terri's Tuesday Tip of the Week - October 9th

All conflict can be traced back to someone’s feelings getting hurt, don’t you think? - Liane Moriarty, Big Little Lies

Knowing when to fight is just as important as knowing how. - Terry Goodkind, Faith of the Fallen

Conflict is drama, and how people deal with conflict shows you the kind of people they are. - Stephen Moyer

According to Merriam-Webster Dictionary, conflict is:

a : competitive or opposing action of incompatibles : antagonistic state or action (as of divergent ideas, interests, or persons) a conflict of principles

b : mental struggle resulting from incompatible or opposing needs, drives, wishes, or external or internal demands His conscience was in conflict with his duty.

Throughout life, we deal with conflict.  It can be a simple issue such as a difference of opinion on what color pillows to put on a couch or much more in-depth issues.  Conflict no matter the issue can be a hindrance in accomplishing dreams and goals.  In Notorious RBG : the life and times of Ruth Bader Ginsburg and in article by about Justice Ginsburg, she states conflict is counterproductive.  She quoted Eleanor Roosevelt: “Anger, resentment, envy. These are emotions that just sap your energy. They’re not productive and don’t get you anyplace, so get over it.”

Peace is not absence of conflict, it is the ability to handle conflict by peaceful means. - Ronald Reagan

CHALLENGE: What conflict is there in your life?  How are you going to handle it?

Resource

https://bible.knowing-jesus.com/topics/Conflict-Resolution

http://www.propelwomen.org/content/conquering-conflict/gjebb2

http://www.kdheks.gov/hcf/healthquest/download/resource_downloads/conflictresolution.pdf

https://www.forbes.com/sites/mikemyatt/2012/02/22/5-keys-to-dealing-with-workplace-conflict/#324e9d991e95

https://www.helpguide.org/articles/relationships-communication/conflict-resolution-skills.htm

https://www.momentmag.com/ruth-bader-ginsburg-notorious-rbg-interview/

Terri's Tuesday Tip of the Week - October 2nd

Happiness depends on your mindset and attitude. ― Roy T. Bennett, The Light in the Heart

Very little is needed to make a happy life; it is all within yourself, in your way of thinking. - Marcus Aurelius

Over the last couple of weeks, I have been discussing how important it is to train our minds to think positively and encouragingly about oneself.  D. Martyn Lloyd Jones states that we need to stop letting our minds tell us what to think and instead tell our minds what to think:

“Have you realized that most of your unhappiness in life is due to the fact that you are listening to yourself instead of talking to yourself? Take those thoughts that come to you the moment you wake up in the morning. You have not originated them but they are talking to you, they bring back the problems of yesterday, etc. Somebody is talking. Who is talking to you? Your self is talking to you. Now this man’s treatment [in Psalm 42] was this: instead of allowing this self to talk to him, he starts talking to himself. “Why art thou cast down, O my soul?” he asks. His soul had been depressing him, crushing him. So he stands up and says, “Self, listen for moment, I will speak to you.”

As I was dealing with past experiences recently, I had to talk to myself and tell myself I was not what I had been told many years ago.  I had to replace what I was told with strong, positive and confident statements.

CHALLENGE:  Mindsets are one of the most important things that help people accomplish their dreams.  How is your mindset today?

Resource

https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/199587-have-you-realized-that-most-of-your-unhappiness-in-life

https://thepreachersword.com/2016/12/14/great-verses-of-the-bible-phiippians-25/#more-6495

Terri's Tuesday Tip of the Week - September 25th

What seems impossible one minute becomes, through faith, possible the next. - Norman Vincent Peale

And if the mind thinks with a believing attitude one can do amazing things. - Norman Vincent Peale

I am not going to limit my service or my message to the world based on what other people think. I am my own person, and I’m going to be myself regardless. Go out and be great – and never apologize for it. - Brendon Burchard

In the Power of the Plus Factor, Norman Vincent Peale tells the following story:

”Once walking through the twisted little streets of Kowloon in Hong Kong, I came upon a tattoo studio. In the window were displayed samples of the tattoos available.”

“On the chest or arms you could have tattooed an anchor or flag or mermaid or whatever. But what struck me with force were three words that could be tattooed on one’s flesh, ‘Born to Lose’.”

“I entered the shop in astonishment and, pointing to those words, asked the Chinese tattoo artist, “Does anyone really have that terrible phrase, Born to Lose, tattooed on his body?”

He replied, “Yes, sometimes.”

“But,” I said, “I just can’t believe that anyone in his right mind would do that.”

“The Chinese man simply tapped his forehead and in broken English said, ‘Before tattoo on body, tattoo on mind.’

The perspective of the tattoo artist speaks of how important a good attitude is and how important it is to strive to be optimistic even in trying times. 

Remember: what you think you will become - good or bad, weak or strong, defeated or victorious. - Norman Vincent Peale

CHALLENGE: Past experiences often tattoo “bad” perspectives on our minds.  It is always a good time to “tattoo” a new perspective on our minds.  What do you plan on tattooing on your mind this week? 

Resource

https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/199587-have-you-realized-that-most-of-your-unhappiness-in-life

https://thepreachersword.com/2016/12/14/great-verses-of-the-bible-phiippians-25/#more-6495

Terri's Tuesday Tip of the Week - September 18th

Don't let fear or insecurity stop you from trying new things. Believe in yourself. Do what you love. And most importantly, be kind to others, even if you don't like them. - Stacy London

I'm not afraid of storms, for I'm learning how to sail my ship. - Louisa May Alcott

You don’t get rid of yesterday by talking about it all of the time; You get rid of its effect on you by moving forward. - Kingdom Woman by Dr. Tony Evans and Chrystal Evans Hurst

Does your past control your future?

Over the last month, I have had two opportunities of allowing past experiences dictate how I would handle current situations.  In both situations, I had the opportunity to live in fear of things that happened in the past, live in the fear of “what ifs” or take a risk to see what would happen.  Both situations are looking very good right now and I plan on continuing to push forward.

At the end of the day, worrying is like paying interest on a loan you don’t haven’t taken out yet. Don’t let it paralyze you. (themastershift.com)

When I realized I was allowing fear of things from my past affect my future actions, I did soul searching and research on the internet.  I discovered that the reason I reacted as I did was because the situations I was dealing with were triggers based on past experiences and not the situation I was currently in.  When I realized this, I was able to analyze the situation and determine how to proceed. 

Even today as I was writing this post, I had a situation that affected me.  Instead of calling someone to discuss, I took time to analyze it, processed it for a couple hours and realized why I reacted the way I did.   By learning from these situations, I am helping to overcome the past and prepare myself for my future. 

CHALLENGE:  Are there any past experiences that are controlling you and prohibiting you from accomplishing your dreams?  If so, how do you plan on handling them?

Resources

https://themastershift.com/dont-let-fear-paralyze-you-let-it-motivate-you/

http://www.masteringyourlife.com/your-past-your-future/spiritual-breakthrough

Terri's Tuesday Tip of the Week - September 11th

You have the chance every single morning to make that change and be the person you want to be. - Brendon Burchard

With the right habits, anyone can dramatically increase results and become a high performer in almost any field of endeavor. – Brendon Burchard

A change in bad habits leads to a change in life. - Jenny Craig

The only proper way to eliminate bad habits is to replace them with good ones. - Jerome Hines

Over the summer months, did the snooze button get hit a lot?  Is this a new “bad” habit started due to the craziness of summer?  Stand-up comedian Demetrius Martin said:  

If you really think about it, hitting the snooze button on your alarm clock doesn’t even make sense.  It’s like saying, ‘I hate getting up in the morning—so I do it over, and over, and over again…’

Summer months are wonderful and there is definitely a time for rest and relaxation.  However, now that the fall action plan is created, and a daily routine is being implemented, this is a great time to rid the daily routine of any “bad” habits. 

When instituting new habits into daily life, remember the following points:

1.       There is not a “one-size-fits-all solution for habit change” as discussed in Terri’s Tuesday Tip of the Week on February 7, 2017 (https://tuesdaytipoftheweek.blogspot.com/2017/02/terris-tuesday-tip-of-week-february-7th.html).  It is important to find what works for your life.   

2.       To have behavioral change, it all comes down to incorporating a new “response” when a trigger “cue” occurs in the daily routine and then a “reward”.  To learn more, read Terri’s Tuesday Tip of the Week from March 7, 2017 (https://tuesdaytipoftheweek.blogspot.com/2017/03/terris-tuesday-tip-of-week-march-7th.html). 

CHALLENGE:  Determine if there are any “bad” habits from the summer that need to be changed and create a “cue-response-reward” plan to change bad habits into good habits. 

Resources

https://www.rd.com/health/wellness/10-bad-habits-and-the-best-ways-to-quit-them/

https://blog.12min.com/high-performance-habits-summary/

https://impacttheory.com/episode/brendon-burchard/

https://smallbusiness.yahoo.com/advisor/only-takes-five-minutes-become-morning-person-130000414.html

https://www.miraclemorning.com/hals-blog-posts/snooze-proof-wake-up-strategy/

https://gretchenrubin.com/2016/01/dont-fall-for-the-common-habits-myth-that-stops-people-from-making-successful-change

Terri's Tuesday Tip of the Week - September 4th

The key is in not spending time, but in investing it. - Stephen R. Covey

My favorite things in life don’t cost any money. It’s really clear that the most precious resource we all have is time. - Steve Jobs

Know the true value of time; snatch, seize, and enjoy every moment of it. - Lord Chesterfield

Most people spend more time and energy going around problems than in trying to solve them. - Henry Ford

Ordinary people think merely of spending time. Great people think of using it. - Author Unknown

As schedules are being reset going into the fall season, this is a great time to remember the value of time.  Recently, the below poem was stated in a YouTube video that puts into context how important it is to spend time wisely.

If you want to know the value of one year, just ask a student who failed a course.

If you want to know the value of one month, ask a mother who gave birth to a premature baby.

If you want to know the value of one hour, ask the lovers waiting to meet.

If you want to know the value of one minute, ask the person who just missed the bus.

If you want to know the value of one second, ask the person who just escaped death in a car accident.

And if you want to know the value of one-hundredth of a second, ask the athlete who won a silver medal in the Olympics.”

― Marc Levy, Et si c'était vrai..., Vous revoir, édition complète 2 en 1

CHALLENGE:  Going into the fall season and reestablishing a schedule/routine, take time to ponder the time spent on doing various tasks and activities.  Make changes to help accomplish dreams and goals. 

Terri's Tuesday Tip of the Week - August 28th

Where your attention goes, your time goes. - Idowu Koyenikan, Wealth for All: Living a Life of Success at the Edge of Your Ability

The bad news is time flies. The good news is you're the pilot. -  Michael Altshuler

He who every morning plans the transactions of that day and follows that plan carries a thread that will guide him through the labyrinth of the most busy life. - Victor Hugo

We are 118 days away from Christmas and 124 days until New Year’s Eve!

Why is this important?  It means there are only 124 days to finish 2018 goals.  Actually, less than that because once December 1^st arrives we start participating in the many festive Christmas activities and our goals are often forgotten.  So, there are about 94 days to complete 2018 goals! 

To recalibrate after a fun and exciting summer, this is a great time to start thinking about what goals/projects/tasks to complete in the fall of 2018 and create an action plan.  Here are 5 easy steps to follow:

ü  FOCUS - Take time to determine what to focus on for the rest of 2018.  Review goals and create a list of tasks/projects/activities that are the most important or will have the most impact on long terms dreams.  Or maybe something happened over the summer that has changed 2018 goals and focusing on that is most important.   

ü  PRIORITIZE – Summer is wonderful, but it also is a time when other things become priority over completing goals.  Now is a great time to determine when to work on accomplishing goals.  To prioritize, here are a few questions to think about:

Ø  When is the best time of day to schedule time to work on goals?

Ø  What daily schedule needs to be established to accomplish 2018 goals?

Ø  Does the alarm clock need to be set a little earlier to help find time to accomplish 2018 goals?

Ø  What does a productive morning and evening routine need to be to assist in completing 2018 goals?

ü  CHALLENGES – What challenges in the next three months could arise that would prohibit accomplishing 2018 goals?  Is there anything that can be done now to help prevent or prepare to handle those obstacles?

ü  CREATE ACTION PLAN – Mark Twain said:

The secret of getting ahead is getting started.

By creating an action plan, a process was established to determine what is important, tasks were created to help work towards accomplishing the tasks, potential obstacles were considered and prepared for and it is now time to finish strong!

ü  ACCOUNTABILITY – Accountability partners will be a great resource in discussing these various areas with.  

CHALLENGE: Start creating your action plan to finish 2018 strong and complete your goals. 

Resources

https://www.mindtools.com/pages/main/newMN_HTE.htm

Terri's Tuesday Tip of the Week - August 21st

Commitment is finishing what you started even when you don’t feel like doing it anymore.  – Bonnie Pfiester (https://quotesgram.com/img/finish-what-you-started-quotes/4837951)

It’s not what you start in life, it’s what you finish. – K. Hepburn

My therapist told me the way to achieve inner peace is to finish what I start.  So far today, I have finished two bags of M&M’s and a chocolate cake.  I feel better already. – Dave Berry

If all of your dreams were to come true on September 4^th (the Tuesday after Labor Day), are you ready?

As the summer is ending and kids are returning to school, this is a great time to finish any summer goals or summer projects.  When these projects/activities are completed, you will have an awesome feeling of accomplishment and are prepared for your dreams to come true. 

Earlier this year, I wrote about the “book pile” that I wanted to complete, and I am happy to announce I am reading the last book and I have gained a plethora of knowledge through all of these books.  One of the great accomplishments was finishing The Reagan Diaries, which was 693 pages.  When I finished that last page, the feeling of accomplishment was amazing, and I was ready for the next task.

13 days…what summer projects/goals do you need to finish to prepare for your dreams to come true?

Glory awaits you at the finish line. - Pavementrunner.com

CHALLENGE: Create a list of the projects/goals to finish in the next 13 days and start working on completing them. 

Terri's Tuesday Tip of the Week - August 14th

Friendship isn’t a big thing — it’s a million little things. - Author Unknown

A friend is the one who comes in when the whole world has gone out.  - Grace Pulpit

One doesn’t know, till one is a bit at odds with the world, how much one’s friends who believe in one rather generously, mean to one. - D.H. Lawrence

A true friend reaches for your hand and touches your heart. - Attributed to Heather Pryor

My birthday celebration was wonderful!  It started when Mama Flow and I traveled to Valley Forge National Park in late July, which turned out to be my 80^th activity.  Then this past Thursday, I was given a party by two adorable twins that I attend church with.  I have hung out with them a number of times to play games and we exchange hugs each Sunday at church.  They each gave me a potted plant, balloons and beautiful drawings.  AND we had a silly string fight, which was the first time I had ever done that!  On Saturday morning, I participated in my monthly volunteering (2^nd Saturday Serve) and when I walked in the residents sang happy birthday and gave me flowers.  Saturday evening, I went out with a wide variety of my friends in Old Town Alexandria.  A friend of mine and I came up with various activities that incorporated everything that I love into one night including wine, seafood and chocolate.  Friends came at their convenience as I was enjoying what I love in life!

Friendships are so important in life especially when going through trying times.  Tim Cahill said it best:

A journey is best measured in friends, rather than miles. - Tim Cahill

CHALLENGE: Call or send a note to a friend!

To view birthday celebration pictures, view Facebook.

Terri's Tuesday Tip of the Week - August 7th

When life gives you lemons, you build a lemonade stand and profit. -  #bossbabe

Courage is like a muscle; it is strengthened by use. – Ruth Gordon

Fear is a reaction.  Courage is a decision. – Sir Winston Churchill

A goal should scare you a little and excite you a lot. – Joe Vitale

One day during the past year, I was NOT making lemonade with my attitude and was complaining about the lemons in my life.  As I continued to complain, I told my mother this was the worst situation I had ever dealt with.  In her motherly, loving tone, she told “No, it is not!”

Recently as I was listening to a book by John Maxwell, I heard the following quote from Eleanor Roosevelt:   

You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You are able to say to yourself, 'I lived through this horror. I can take the next thing that comes along.'

As I ruminated on my past experiences, I realized that I have gone through tough times and each of those tough times has continued to develop my perseverance to be able to face the next “lemon” that comes my way.  In each situation, the choice is to change a lemon into lemonade. 

It is also important to remember that the “lemon situations” of life are most likely preparing each of us for the dreams and goals we have.  Many times, I have told my mom the “lemon situation” I am dealing with is preparing me for the future.   

CHALLENGE: Learn from the lemon experiences in life and use them to prepare yourself for lemonade.